Lets get one thing straight from the start. I learned these three things not because I followed them, but because I didn't follow them. I learned this wisdom, such as it is, from the pit of despair, not from the pinnacle of success. I am trying to follow them now, at 53 years of age. Kinda late, I know. But, I think most would say better late than never. I think Jesus would say that. One of the reasons I think He lets us suffer is to give us the opportunity to gain wisdom and to share it with others. It is my prayer that this little blog will help some sole in despair somehow, somewhere. Ok, here goes!
RULE NUMBER ONE (THE FUN RULE) Do whatever you want with your life!!! Everyone is going to like this. Follow your muse. Live your passion. Find your vocation. Do your own thing. Insert your own cliché here. Because they're all true. Don't worry about the market. Don't worry that it is hard. Go for it! Want to be an artist, be an artist. Want to be a blacksmith, be a blacksmith. Want to play center field for the Yankees, give it your best shot. Want to be a beach bum, well its a beautiful day. You only go around once in life...and its your life. Be who you want to be.
Wow! That was fun! There's got to be a catch right? You bet your sweet bippy there is!
RULE NUMBER TWO ( THE NASTY RULE). Try to follow Rule1 and the world will make you swallow lots and lots of shit! Shit from your parents. Shit from your spouse. Shit from your family in general. Shit from your friends. Shit from your enemies. Shit from society, which is just a fancy word for all the people who will tell you how to live your life. Guilt will be heaped upon you. You will be made to feel selfish. Irresponsible. Because there will be two forces dishing out the shit. One is peer pressure, because in a way, high school never ends. All those people who never had the guts to follow rule No. 1 will move heaven and earth to make sure you don't either. Because they don't want you to be happy when they are miserable. Because rule 2 shit can be vicious and terrifying. We wont pay for your college if you don't do what I say. Or I'll divorce you. Never be your friend again. You don't need me to remind you of the nasty things that people can do to you. For most people, this is more than enough to keep them in line.
In case that isn't enough, there is "the system". The system needs you to forget about your dreams so you can work to make its leaders richer. The system needs fodder to stuff its cubicles, clean their toilets, and pick their crops, among other fun things.. The system does want people living their dreams. The system wants slaves. Peer pressure works on your fear of being left behind, of being lonely. The system works on your fear of poverty. To follow our dreams, to follow rule 1, is to risk your financial security. There is a weak safety net and that is the way the system wants it. Its not just that the elites don't want to pay for it. The system wants you to be terrified of walking the tightrope of life without a net. Bottom line: live your life your way and malevolent forces will combine to harass and scare the hell out of you. So very few people do it.
Sounds pretty gloomy, right? But wait, were not done! Time for....
RULE NO. THREE (THE WISE RULE). No matter how much you suffer under Rule 2, It will never be as bad as the REGRETS you will suffer by NOT following rule 1!!!.
How do I know this? Because I have suffered oceans of regret in my life. Because like most of humanity, I caved in to Rule 2. Tried to take the safe way. Let other people lead me by the nose. For example, I would have loved to major in history or political science in college. But because I felt that I had to have a "marketable" degree, I majored in.....business. Not only did I hate it, not only did it bore me to death, the stuff I "learned" had no application in real life or is totally obsolete now. It did not make me any more money. Neither that obnoxious blowhard of a marketing professor, nor I, knew that something called the "internet" was coming down the pike and that said "internet" would reduce his words to a pile of gibberish. Like almost everyone else, when I came to a problem, I had to teach myself. I always loved history and politics. Like every amateur blogger worth his salt. I believe that my stuff is much better than a lot of the idiots who get paid for it. Why are they getting paid for it? Because they starting writing out of college. Do I have regrets about not being a writer out of college? With every keystroke on my blog. Rule 3 pain of regret is blistering and blinding. At least I learned this in my early 50's. I still have a shot. At least I am not finding this out on my deathbed like no many other poor souls. Thank you Jesus. Don't YOU wait until you are fifty years old to follow your own personal Rule One.
This is equally true in romance. Ask that guy or girl out! I am happily married now, but it doesn't mean I don't have any regrets. When I was in high school, I had a terrible crush on a girl. I was too shy to ask her out. The regrets still haunt me to this day, even though my rational brain says things worked out for the better. Luckily when I got to law school I had some unconscious inkling of the Three Rules of life. I fell in love with one of the most desired women in our class. I thought to myself, this time I wont let her go by! This won't be high school! So I pulled out all the romantic stops. Even lost a ton of weight to impress her. Know what? She turned me down flat. It really hurt at the time. But it doesn't hurt now! Unlike High School Girl, I barely think of her. Because I tried. Because I gave it my best! Took a big swing for the fences and I wiffed. Big time. But there are no regrets. At least I had the guts, for once in my life, to get in the game and step up to the plate.
One of the favorite tricks of Rule Two slaves is to say that following Rule One is selfish. Don't believe it. Do you want to help our poor, suffering world? Than stand up to all the drones who are ruining the world while their souls are slip sliding away (thank you Paul Simon).If you want to help the world, live your passion, because people who live their passion are exactly what this hurting world needs. Think about it.
Dear people, the biggest lie people believe is that you can live a life without suffering. This is the lie that makes people give up their dreams. People believe they can take the easy path. But its a terrible trick. Folks, in this life you are going to suffer. I wish it were otherwise. But we have the choice of how we suffer. We can suffer the pains of living our dreams. We can also suffer the pain of failure. Nobody likes to fail. But better to fail than not to try at all. Because there is nothing more horrible than the pain of regret. So, Good People, move heaven and earth to find out what your personal Rule 1 is and live it! Bravely prepare yourself for the inevitable Rule 2 heat, as bad as it might get. Because Rule Three is the wisest and deadliest of truths. Dear Jesus, give me the strength to bear the crosses of Life. Help me avoid the pain of regret.
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